Meet Deena Knight! She has been married to Brevin Knight (Former NBA player turned NBA Commentator) for 11 years and they have 3 beautiful kids together… How did they meet? How does she accomplish personal goals all while balancing being a mother and wife to a spouse who travels frequently? Does she get along with her In-Laws and how did she start blogging? She states this is how she feels on most days—–—->
But let’s be real most of us moms feel like there are times we are holding onto dear life! There are times we even thrive in chaos because often we have no choice. Let’s see how this NBA wife keeps her family and her personal schedule organized so things run smoothly! Personally, I think she is the next Martha Stewart! Deena has timeless style, she’s creative and most of all has a big heart! So all of you superwomen out there, get ready to be charmed sepia style!
How did you and your husband meet?
We met at a party at Stanford University. He was a sophomore and I was a junior. Yep, I’m a cradle-robber, lol (actually, I’m only 8 months older, but he never lets me forget).
Sometimes in this high-profile life of the NBA wives can lose themselves in their husbands career and knowing who they are outside of being an NBA wife, what do you do to stay connected to your true self? How do you balance your lifestyle with being a mom, wife and still accomplishing your own personal goals?
I’ve never defined myself by my husband’s career. He’s had ups and downs. That’s his job and has nothing to do with me. Of course I support him, but I can’t take any credit for his accomplishments. I stay grounded by connecting with “normal” people: family, friends, neighbors, moms from my kids’ schools, my Sorors of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc, and people who I’ve met thru various organizations. It has never been my goal to be “high-profile,” or to merely associate with people who would be regarded as “high-profile.” Honestly, we’re fairly low-key and I like it like that. As for my goals, my husband has always supported anything I’ve chosen to do. For five years we owned a children’s furniture store in Memphis, and I really loved that, but once we left TN is was hard to maintain it from a distance, so we shut it down. For the next few years, I focused on establishing a non-profit for girls. While I still feel there is such a need for that and I truly poured my heart into it, I couldn’t take it to the next level without sacrificing too much quality time with my family, so I took a break from it last year. Rather than running our own non-profit, which requires a tremendous amount of resources, we decided to just support local and national charities. Now, I’m writing my blog and he always makes comments and supports me whole-heartedly.
Now I know your in-laws and I would steal them if I could, lol, because your mother-in-law was like a mom to me in college, as she was to many of the young black girls at SHU! How would you say your relationship is with your in-laws & what do u advised to newly married couples on how to get along with their in-laws?
Lol–they are great. They are very supportive and definitely treat me like a daughter. Initially, it took some getting used to. She has lots of SHU “daughters!” Seriously, I think the key is patience, respect, and inclusion. Having my own son, I see why mother-in-laws might struggle. We adore our sons and want to make sure they choose their partners well, and that they will always make time for mom. Ultimately, it is not a competition. We’re all family and there is plenty of love to go around. We take annual trips with our in-laws as well as visiting whenever we can. And, through the years, I have looked to them for lots of advice. I think my MIL appreciates that.
How is life after basketball? How did you plan for it?
I didn’t plan for it, because I thought he had a few more years to go. But when his instincts told him it was time to hang up his sneakers, he did just that, without second-guessing. He was so confident with his decision that I trusted it too. At first, I worried that he might suffer an identity crisis, but he didn’t. He transitioned very smoothly into the media side of the business, first doing radio and now TV. He really didn’t miss a beat. The first year was great, because he worked locally. He made it to EVERY event, for the first time ever. We all loved that. He’s back to traveling quite a bit now, but not as bad as when he was playing. I’m pretty used to that rhythm, so we make it work. I try not to complain. He really enjoys it and he couldn’t be sitting at home doing nothing. That would kill him.
You blog now how did you get into blogging? What can people expect when they visit sepia charm?
I got into blogging after I became interested in reading design blogs…not the mean ones, but the ones that had to do with home design and fashion, being a mom, and subjects like those. I had always been a fan of design magazines (obsessed actually) and would ultimately enjoy working as an interior designer or in the magazine industry. As I would check in on certain blogs, I started to feel encouraged that I could write something that people might enjoy reading as well. Sepia Charm was born one summer evening when I just decided to go for it. I told myself to just write something. The ideas started flowing and I’ve since written 53 posts. I write on a range of subjects, but if I had to sum it up into a few words I would say it’s about how life meets design–interior, fashion, organization, etc. I might write on organizing my closet or adding pops of color to my wardrobe, but it’s going to be tied into a cute personal story somehow. I hope that people will read it, relate to the moments, and walk away with a bit of inspiration. They may even get a couple of laughs. For instance, I got lots of fun feedback on a post called “minivans and louboutins” on coming to terms with my mommy-mobile.
Why do u think major magazines are missing *our* point of view& what will you do to change that?
Now, please allow me to step onto my soap-box for just a moment. Those same design magazines that I mentioned loving, really frustrate me as well. When they showcase all these beautiful homes, it’s rare that they feature “our” families (outside of celebrities). Certainly we also have swoon-worthy homes, that anyone would enjoy seeing featured (not just other African-Americans). I’m also 100% sure that those homes would reflect a variety of tastes and style preferences from classic, to modern, to over-the-top glam…you name it. So why aren’t we represented? It’s certainly not about our lack of participation as consumers, right? I believe that is probably more of a reflection on our presence (or lack there of) in the industry. When you flip thru the contributors section of most major publications (besides the ones “for us, by us”), i think it’s safe to say that there are a very limited number of us at the party. I just believe there is such a perception issue about who we are as a community and what matters to us.
I haven’t exactly figured out the “who’s who” of the African-American design/blog community, but that is one of my personal goals. I want to find them, partner with them, and feature them. I am also gearing up to start submitting to magazines myself. This is how I see myself changing things…just by joining the conversation and seeing who listens (I’m currently on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest). On a side note, though who I am is absolutely my husband’s wife, I really don’t want it to be about that, because I have lots of friends who are bankers, doctors, lawyers, teachers, entrepreneurs, etc. who have fabulous taste and would be wonderful subjects as well.
What do you do to splurge& treat yourself?
Shopping, Shoes and Spa-days with girlfriends! I’m a total girly-girl. I wish I could do those things with regularity, but I don’t. Recently, I found myself in Atlanta with my daughters for a dance competition. When they both ended up with plans for the evening, I delighted in room service and a George Clooney movie. That was absolute bliss for me. I don’t need much. Most days, I’d settle for a nap or a chance to clear out my Directv playlist.
What are some great organizing tips you use as a mom and wife to make sure your household is run smoothly?
A personal schedule and a family calendar is crucial. With all of us coming and going in so many different directions, it’s important to keep up with appointments and deadlines. We use the Cozi app on the iPhone, but I’ve recently accepted that I like an old-fashion paper calendar. I also tried to create a place for everything when we built our house, though getting the stuff there is a work in progress, lol. We’ve also tried to limit our weeknight screen time, in an attempt to be more focused and deliberate with our evenings. Oh! And chalkboard paint! I’m a huge fan of this stuff. You can leave messages and write reminders and make lists…you name it. I have it on the pantry door, in my office, and in the kids’ office. It’s very handy. If I don’t write something down, forget about it! But, at the end of the day, I try to preach Grace and Flexibility. If we all recognize that we are on the same team and forgive each other when we make mistakes and try to fix what we can, it’s all good. I also notice that we all need one-on-one time to get our hearts full, so we try to pair off when we can to make that happen. Seems like when we’re happy and communicating things just run much more smoothly. That’s not to say it’s perfect, I am always putting out fires and getting off schedule, but that’s where the grace has to come in.
And she does this with Grace indeed! Visit Sepia Charm and be inspired to see life through sepia colored glasses…Find Sepia Charm on Facebook by clicking here.
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